


Bad Wolf, Sad Wolf

by nexttonotnormal



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gonna get some fluff in there, I might make this a slow burn, Parallel world, Post-Episode: s02e13 Doomsday, Reunion, TenRose - Freeform, we will see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-26
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-24 09:25:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13808313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nexttonotnormal/pseuds/nexttonotnormal
Summary: Rose had to say goodbye at Bad Wolf Bay, and she hasn't been doing well, missing The Doctor every waking moment. When things start to happen, Bad Wolf lapping at the edges of her mind, does this mean she can reunite with her beloved Doctor?





	1. Loss

**Author's Note:**

> Hiya! Might make this a nice slow burn if I keep the motivation up. d: I do plan for this to be multiple chapters so stay tuned! Also apologies for making this chapter rather short, I'm just starting this one out, and I thought where I ended was a good place to end. Future chapters will be longer!

   Her things were still packed away in suitcases, having been long since taken out of her car. She didn’t have the heart to unpack them. She had been sure, _so_ sure that he was going to take her with him, back to the Tardis, back to their life together, on the run, danger at every turn, with him holding her hand the entire time.

   She had been so sure.  
   She had been wrong.

   She sighed, running her hands over her jeans, slowly standing from her bed, her muscles aching in protest as she did so. It wasn’t the normal ache she was used to, the one from constant running. It was more of a dull ache. A dull ache that spread throughout her entire being, an ache that seemed never ending.  
Stretching her sore muscles, she went to the mirror, examining herself.

   The first thing she noticed was the bags. Dark purple rings the rested beneath her eyes, reminding her of how little sleep she had been getting. Nightmares plagued her, of that day. She had deemed it “Doomsday”. Rather fitting. If it was not a nightmare, it was a sweet, sweet, dream that made her entire being feel hollow when she awoke, cold, and alone. Alone in a world where she didn’t belong. Lost in a parallel world.

   Next was her face. It had grown slimmer, along with the rest of her body. Cheekbones more defined, hip bones jutting out a bit, collarbones peeking out from beneath her shirt. It was nice, she had to admit, but it wasn’t a great diet plan that had did that for her. Food hadn’t interested her much, she couldn’t really bring her appetite back. When she had first arrived, she hadn’t ate for a week, until she passed out from dehydration, that was when Jackie had practically forced her to at least eat some chips.

   That was how it was now. Her mum’s eyes always watching her, the tired eyes of a worried mother.

   A sigh escaped her lips, a soft crackling sound, her throat long since been stripped raw from violent crying.

   She turned from the mirror, not noticing a glint of gold in her eyes. A glint that maybe she should have noticed.

   As if on cue, Jackie appeared in the doorway, another steamy cup of tea in her hands. She tried to act like she didn’t see how the previous cup of tea was still full, now cold. Instead, she gave her daughter a smile, placing it into her hands, hoping she’d at least take a sip.

   “I thought a good cuppa’ would do you some good.” She smiled, trying to keep upbeat for Rose’s sake, and perhaps her own.

   “Thanks mum.” Rose mumbled, just holding the tea in her hands, letting it warm the cold numbness she felt to her very bones.

     Jackie nodded, looking over Rose’s features, noting how she wouldn’t look her in the eye, how her eyes were always far away, looking out, out to somewhere she couldn’t get to. She could assume she knew exactly what she was searching for.

   The silence rang out for a few moments, but to Rose, it felt like an eternity. She just wanted her mother to leave her alone. She appreciated the sentiment, but she couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t stand the worried gaze, the way she looked at her with such pity.

   Jackie opened her mouth as if to speak, but Rose beat her to the punch.

   “Why don’t you go see what Dad s’up to?” She put on a weak smile, she couldn’t remember the last time she smiled for real. “He loves to feel your belly.” She lightly teased. Her mother was pregnant with her little brother or sister. Since in this parallel world, Rose had never been born, this was Pete’s first experience with the whole thing. He was soaking it all up, enjoying the joys of being a father that he had never experienced with her. Although he had grown to love her as his own daughter, it wasn’t the same, and she knew it never would be.

   Jackie, looking somewhat defeated, gave her daughter a small smile, reaching forward to squeeze her arm.

   “Drink your tea sweetie.” She patted the same arm, turning to leave, but paused in the doorway. “He wouldn’t want you to let yourself be this way. He would have wanted you to be happy.”

   Rose blinked, squeezing the cup in her hand rather tightly.

   “How can I..?” She whispered, already feeling the tears spring to her eyes, and she blinked them back as quickly as they came.

   “All you can do is try.” She assured her gently, giving her a look of encouragement, before stepping out, closing the door behind her.

   As soon as her mother left, Rose let out a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding, setting the steaming cup of tea down next to the other one, not really intending to drink it. She was alone again, and somehow that comforted her, knowing no one else could see into her thoughts. She wore her emotions on her face nowadays, she didn’t bother to hide it. She had no reason to.

   She laid back down on her bed, staring up at her ceiling, her ceiling that had been decorated with paint, paintings she had done herself. Paintings of all the planets she had been to, all the stars, every last one she could remember. It had taken her days to finish it all, but it had kept her occupied, kept her mind off of the inevitable.

   She could feel the heaviness of sleep wanting to take over, as it often did. Blinking, her vision growing slightly fuzzy, she whispered into the still air.

   “I miss you.”

   It trailed off as she felt herself slipping into darkness, eyes finally succumbing to the lulling of sleep.

 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  Somewhere, across the universe, in another world, a man, a lonely man, a Doctor for that matter, looked up from his console, the hum of the Tardis whirring. There were whispers of words reaching his ears. Words that shouldn’t be able to reach him, couldn’t.

_“I miss you.”_

   His hearts practically stopped beating in his chest.

   That was Rose’s voice.


	2. Heart(s)break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor remembers Rose, and Rose sees something that makes her wonder..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup. This is gonna be a nice slow simmering burrrrrrnn.

   The Doctor’s head spun, but his body stayed perfectly still, leaned against the console of the Tardis.

   “No No No, that can’t be.” He said aloud, his face contorted into a deep frown of confusion, and longing. “It couldn’t have been…” He looked up, pacing around the circular grate around the console. 

 

   “Parallel world...not possible!” He paused, looking up to the ceiling. “But it sounded so  _ real! _ ” He paced faster now, his hands moving up to ruffle his hair, as he always did when he was thinking, or frustrated. He knew that Rose had always liked when he did that. Then again, she was just fond of his hair in general.

 

   Dispelling that thought, his fingers hovered over some nozzles and levers, debating on scanning, searching for the possibility that the voice he heard, was in fact real. He could hear the steady drumming of his hearts in his ears, the way his mouth had gone completely dry.

 

   He stepped back from the controls, leaning back to sit in the chair instead.

 

  “What am I doing?” He sighed, not sure if he was more talking to the Tardis, or himself. “It’s simply not possible. Even if it was her voice I heard, there is no way to get her back, and besides, how many times have I hallucinated her voice in the time she’s been gone?” He ran his hands through his hair again, this time rather roughly. “I think I’m losing my marbles.”

 

  All the Tardis did was send out a soothing hum, enticing a smile from The Doctor.

 

   “At least I’ll always have you old girl.” He commented affectionately, before growing silent, letting his body still while his mind stirred with memories he tried to bury. Memories of her hand, her smooth pale hand in his, as they ran for their lives, laughing with the thrill of it all. Memories of the things they had seen, the lives they had saved, the lives they had lost….they had shared it all. The good, the bad. Since The Great Time War, he hadn’t been the same man. He didn’t think he ever would be. He held all of his demons, locked away deep in his hearts, where no one could ever touch, the black shadows lapping at his being, reminding him with every thud of his pulse, with every breath he took. 

   But then there was Rose.

   Rose, who had breathed life back into him, who had given him something to look forward to in her deep hazel eyes, someone to share the wonders of the universe with, to show her what she had been missing while she worked in a little shop in London. To remind him that he wasn’t a monster. That he was worth something. 

 

   There was so much more he had wanted to do with her, so much more he wanted her to see, all of the universe that was just calling out her name, beckoning for her to come explore it.

 

   But now he never had that chance.

 

   So many possibilities, gone in a split second, right before his eyes, as her fingers slipped.

 

   He could still hear her screams in his head as she flew towards the void. They echoed in his mind painfully, causing him to put his hands on the sides of his head, closing his eyes.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

_    “Hold on!!” He screamed over the raging void, Daleks and Cybermen being pulled into nothingness. She had to hold on. If she let go...he didn’t want to think about that, not that he could even think at the moment. All he could do was watch helplessly as Rose held on her for her life, while he was safe. He prayed to the Gods that she would be okay, she had to be okay. He promised. _

 

_    Her fingers were slipping, ever so slowly, panic growing in her eyes. He locked eyes with her, silently begging, pleading. Not her. Anyone but her. Please. _

 

_    “Hold on!!” He called again, reaching for her desperately, but knowing it was no use, he couldn’t reach her without being sucked into the void himself. He was no use to her dead. His mind was racing, trying, thinking, trying to come up with something, anything.  _

 

_    That was when her fingers slipped. _

 

_    “ROSE!!” He screamed in complete anguish, watching as Rose, his Rose, was being sucked towards the void, her arms outstretched, reaching for him, her screams echoing throughout the room, reverberating in his head. _

 

_    A flash of light. _

 

_   Pete Tyler. He caught her. _

 

_   They made eye contact, her eyes the look of relief, but also afraid, and sad. He had no idea what he looked like. A mess no doubt. _

 

_    And she was gone. _

 

_    The void closed, and he was left, alone.  _

 

_    He had done it, but yet, he felt like he hadn’t done anything at all.  _

_    But she was safe, and that was all that mattered. _

 

_    He detached himself from the clamp, his body feeling like it was moving in slow motion. He walked towards the other side of the white room, where the void had been, now closed and gone.  _

_    He paused, staring at the wall, feeling a steady warmness creep into the edges of his consciousness, the kind he only felt when Rose was there. He had never told her, thought it was silly. Besides, humans didn’t have an understanding of telepathic bonds...not that he had one with Rose anyways. It was more of a comforting feeling that nipped at the corner of his mind, reminding him of what he had tried so hard to deny. _

 

_    He stepped a bit more forward, slowly leaning his hand and cheek against the coolness of the wall, feeling the warm in his mind heighten. He knew it would be gone soon, the only thing bringing it through was the remainder of her that had been there moments before, air particles, a wisp of hair..whatever it was.  _

 

_    He was sure she was on the other side too. _

 

_    He sat there for a long while, before tearing himself away, the warmness seeping away, a feeling he had to learn to live without. _

 

_    Forever. _

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

   He squeezed his eyes shut a bit harder, willing the memories to cease, the echoes of her screaming to fly away into the vortex.

 

   All he was met with was the hollow beating of his hearts, a painful reminder that he was still alive.

 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  
  


   Rose woke with a start some time later, her lit room now darkened. She must have slept through the rest of the day…

 

   She ran a hand over her hair with a slight groan, her muscles, once again protesting at any sort of movement. God was she tired. It seemed like no matter how much she slept, she woke up tired. She had grown sort of used to it. Although, it wasn’t like she had slept much lately anyways. The last time she had a good night's sleep was aboard the Tardis.

 

   She rolled over on her side, banishing the thoughts, despite the protest in her muscles, staring at the wall in what little light she had. She could have sworn she had heard...crying. It sounded like a man, a man was crying and had woke her up. She was about to dismiss it as a dream, when she  _ heard _ it. It was soft, broken sobs. Whoever this man was...he was sad...it almost sounded familiar…

 

   She snorted aloud, a bitter sound to her ears. She had lost her marbles, that was what it was. Probably due to exhaustion, or dehydration. Yeah, that was it. 

 

   She blinked, feeling a warm sensation in the tips of her fingers. Odd. She wiggled her fingers a bit, but the feeling persisted. Sitting up with more protest from her sore muscles, her eyes instinctively went to the mirror.

 

   She was met with eyes of gold light that did not look like her own.

 

   She blinked, a sinking feeling in her stomach, and was met with darkness once again.

 

   “Wha…” Her voice trailed off, frowning. 

 

   She had  _ definitely _ lost her marbles now. 

 

   Gold.

 

   It reminded her of the shimmery golden falls she had seen in a distant planet, far, far away. Geelendalda it was called. Took her ages to remember that one.

 

   Her eyes were gold. But now they weren’t. Or was she just sleep deprived? Her fingertips still felt oddly warm, spreading throughout her palm. It didn’t scare her, but made her wonder. It wasn’t a bad sensation, but what was it? Where was it coming from?

 

   Now she was starting to sound like The Doctor.

 

   Rose winced visibly when his name ran through her head, bringing pleasant feelings of hope, happiness, and most importantly,  _love,_ before swallowing her into the black emptiness once again. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    _"Am I ever gonna see you again?"_

 

_"You can't."_

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

   She eyed her reflection in the mirror, swallowing hard and she closed and opened her hand a few times, the warmth slowly dissipating. Whatever it was, it had stopped.

 

   She went back to sleep.

 

 

 

_    The time will come when the rose will wilt, and the lonely god will mourn it’s fate.  _


End file.
